Returning...

I have returned.

And perhaps in some way I have returned to myself.

My adventure away was lovely...
I learned so much on the management course, and particularly loved the bits on emotional intelligence, ego states and finding out I am an ENFP {Extraverted Intuition with Introverted Feeling}. Shockingly enough, I'm a feeeeeeelllleerrr.

For me, the big parts weren't really about the course.
It was the time away, alone~ness and interactions with new spirits.


moss grows there everywhere...

I had some divine times sharing with others. Highlights include ~
:: a morning tea chat turning into a discussion of god, buddhism and infinite love with the lovely j
:: hearing a diver's stories of diving in antartica and seeing the majesty of seals swimming
:: sitting in emergency ward with a girl who had been sitting across from me at dinner. her finger had been caught in a window, so we decided to have an "emergency ward adventure." i think we may just have been the happiest emergency ward attendees at 11pm. we giggled madly, talked about yoga and spirituality, and took an emergency kit of amusement with us: mermaid cards, stones, yoga books and the results of her latest shopping expeditions. i was kinda disappointed that she got attended to so quickly! an adventure indeed...


sweet, sweet incubation space...




My room there was filled with beautiful energy ~ it was huge, and coloured cream. For the first time in my life, I really fell in love with cream. I felt like I was being held in a cream womb. It was soft and kind, earthy and love~filled. I find myself wanting to paint paintings dripping with cream. The bed was elevated, and looked out over the huge couch, through the wooden blinds to the sweeping pines and out to the lake. I discovered later that it was the bridal suite of the lodge... the universe was filled with blessings for me.



I heard only the beat of my own heart while in that room ~ it was incubation. It was only the third time I had spent away from Chris in our five years together. I spent the time retreating, journalling, opening the bay windows to look down to the lake. I don't know if I can describe what happened there, and I don't know if I need to. I only know that I did it for me, I heard it for me, and this time, that is enough.

My journal is filled with my days and moments. It speaks of the mountains and the waves, and it sings of them like a conch shell.



I learned again just how much I love Leonie company. I feel like my board has been wiped clean, and coloured cream. Ready to begin again, paint a new coloured life for me.


i feel new direction in me...
a deepening of my innate knowing of north...

I return and find myself wanting to paint all the rooms in my house cream, make a lake in my backyard, and clean the house out. Simplify into peacefulness.


the field outside my door...

I return, and want to write something beautiful on this blank slate of mine... i am on a detox of all varieties, following the book 10 days to better health. It isn't just about the food ~ it's about herbal teas, dream diaries, aromatherapy, stretching, breathing and meditation. I want to be all I can be. I want to reside gracefully and meaningfully in this temple of mine.

I feel clearer, I feel creamier, I feel in my womb. I walk the streets and I hear me.