Thursday, February 23, 2006

intent



tree at namadgi national park from last weekend's walk...

for months now, i have skitting around my intention for the busi-ness of creating. perhaps it has been something i have not wanted to look at all my life. i didn't allow myself the possibility of being an artist or writer after school - i did finance; studied at university doing economics and all manner of things for a while; became a public servant. but this life, this passion, this yearning called creativity followed me. it asked for my attention. it called me.


i stopped studying a year ago because i felt a deep need to leave space in my life for something to grow. i wasn't sure WHAT wanted to grow, but only that i needed to honour space to grow in my life. and i did, and the seeds that had been nourished in my earth for years blossomed. blossomed more wildly than i had imagined.

i began working part time three months ago, and started reading "the seed handbook."
i started doing all the exercises in it in my new blue busi-ness book, but came to a screeching halt when i got to the intentions section.

i participated in creative dream teams, and felt great big bounds of movement there. i said outloud: i really need to write to write my intentions for my busi-ness. it seemed like something to big to mount. i wondered what was stopping me.

i know now.

i realised today that the idea of having a creative business came with a degree of guilt or selfishness. i wondered exactly why i should expect to be abundant or rewarded doing something that i loved. i did not know how to resolve my spiritual yearnings with my creative desires to be successful. i couldn't figure out the economics of how i could illuminate my own life and others and earn a living at it. it seemed selfish to put a price on my gifts that i wished to share. there seemed to be some underlying issue of: WHY should i earn money from this?

the understanding is slowly coming together in glowing moments. the insights come and leave again. i know it will come in the fullness of time. i need not push to understand the great mystery.

i can begin to write my intention today. i can begin to see just how spirituality, creativity and busi-ness can be interwoven authentically.

to be radiant in this world. to make a living at being the very best me i can be. it seems so.... natural. to create a living by LIVING.

more will come later... more insight, a fuller insight into just how inherently important it is for each and every soul to do what they love, and share their light with the world.

for now, i set my intentions, watch and muse.
i write letters in the candlelight. wrap my fingers around the arms of the man i love, and see how his sky eyes look into me. curl into bed with a book. let the rainbows pour from my fingers. go to bed feeling like a vessel that has fulfilled its daily potential, and is now empty, ready to be replenised by deep sleep and lyrical dreams.

and tomorrow, a goddess arrives. a blissful weekend saunters ahead, filled with sweet laughter, delicious vegetarian food, deep connecting, creation sharing...


splendid sharings:::
~ swirly girl's stirrings
~ bohemian girl's millionaire spirit
~ quantum awareness



3 comments:

Anonymous said...

my friend/musician kristin hoffmann has a song (my FAVORITE) about following other peoples' light when you are lost, and being a light for other people... i wanted to share...


Lay Down Your Light (Hoffmann, Cunning)

A searchlight
On the night sky
When I find you
I see a sign of life
Shine, shine
Throw your mysteries aside

Lay down your light
And we’ll go dancing through the night
You got to lay down your light
You’re beautiful, beautiful
Come into the night

You’re a soft light
In the distance
And when you come to me
The most beautiful thing that I ever did see
And I, no longer terrified
I’ll give you all I can’t hide

Lay down your light
And I’ll go dance into your night
You got to lay down your light
You’re beautiful, beautiful
You know you got to lay down your light
And we’ll go dancing through the night
You got to lay down your light
You’re beautiful, beautiful, beautiful

All is new tonight
Only you can hide

Lay down your light…

boho girl said...

beautiful photos.
beautiful words.

i love what your BE~ing is bringing up in you.

lovins,
denise xoxo

GailNHB said...

Thanks for sharing Ben with us. I went to his blog: such excellent spirit and peace there. And also with you. Yeah for you, Leonie. Keep on growing and learning and following the Light as it leads you. Gail