Wednesday, May 18, 2005

honest power

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cards i picked this week to meditate on...

I'm kinda getting it.
The whole P O W E R thing.
Finding the power in honesty.
In my own truth.
Even if its scary.

I started saying what I really meant a little while ago.
I'm not sure what began it, but I stopped saying the niceties, the things I thought I should say,
and started saying the things I really thought.

I'm only beginning, and it's a process,
it's a journey,
but i already feel how it's changed my innards.
How I feel stronger, braver, in my step.

Things like:

"No, it's not about me at all - I'm only saying this for your good" ~~~ that has turned into:
"Yes, it does annoy me when you do it. And I don't think you're honouring yourself either."

"Yes" into "No" and "No" into "Yes"

Saying "fine" when someone asks me how i am ~~~ if i'm not fine, i say it. i say "i'm actually feeling tender today. but i am glad for it."

Giving people spontaneous hugs even when its inappropriate.

Saying firmly and lovingly: "No more talking about this. Don't bring work home with you in spirit."

Not trying to find other excuses ~ instead just saying: look, i can't afford it right now.

I have been amazed at the power it gives me when I actually say what I mean.
Just an inner calmness, a peace, a gentle and rising power.
Getting closer to what it is my heart speaks.
Finding the truth by letting go of white lies...

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